We all know that bookworms like the Present Author don't really fancy reading a long treatise on a web browser. You could consider printing it, but we also all know that that only results in a disorderly mass of unnumbered A4 sheets you will "read later", right? Well, here is the solution: the Prosody Guide is now available as a pocketsize paperback book.

• The Guide is just as goofy, but the more blatant obscenities and idiosyncrasies have been somewhat blunted; in other words, you can discuss it in polite society, and even use it as a textbook.
• High-quality English translations of all the quoted foreign texts.
• A complete bibliography at the end of each chapter.
• Explanatory notes to some of the most esoteric passages in the text.
• Each copy you buy contributes to shifting the balance of the Present Author's life from chemical engineer to writer. This means he will be devoting more time to this website, enlighten you more, and possibly write more books; unfortunately, while you were sitting on your derrière and considering whether or not to buy the book, the Present Author found a job he loves. As a consequence, you now have to buy ten times more books to convince him; remember, however: you have brought this on yourself.
• Each book you buy makes the Present Author happy. Being a devoted atheist and therefore having no inhibitions about lying about what He considers a thoroughly imaginary subject, He grants all the devotees among you an immediate place in a heaven of their choice for every purchased copy. Additional copies can be used to grant a similar position to family members, favourite pop stars, and even politicians (although, if your deity has any standards to speak of, those will take a lot of copies).